Should’ves & could’ves have threatened my heart world again lately. I know they are the language of regret. I know they are in the background of grief over losses. I know the pictures they present to my mind appear so brilliant because they act on after-the-fact information. But I also know they are dangerous to soul health and can be used by our spiritual enemy to steal away joy, crush hope, and hinder faith.
So I’m rejoicing this morning that regrets and grief have not conquered my heart, and I pause in wonder at the grace of God that’s invaded my heart, surrounded and conquered the thoughts that have threatened to disable me, giving me an inner strength to move forward in this moment, into tomorrow.
The snowfall last night and into this morning left a foot of heavy, wet snow. After an hour of shoveling a walk to our cars, the weakness in my back and legs showed up big time and I had to come in and head for the Ibuprofen bottle. Grief over lost ability to work threatened to undue my snow-cheered attitude and once again I had to put the remembrance of youthful vigor in proper perspective – with God’s help. And now, after coming back in and resting, making breakfast for Julia and me, and doing the dishes, I think I’m ready to return.
But wait! God has sent reinforcements!
My neighbor just showed up with his snow blower. Yeah John!
It really is true! God does answer prayer and he does care about showing up in our weakness to demonstrate his great love for us. To say I should have been able to do that work, and I could have if I hadn’t been afflicted with aging arthritis and calcification of muscles simply does not fit the moment.
My tomorrow with the Lord is testifying to my today that it is far greater than yesterday’s casualties. His gracious mastery of my life is a mastery of my heart’s greatest enemies and at the end of the day, Jesus wins!
There’s a song lyric that says, “Each morning brings you closer to your goal so grab your chance, don’t let it go.”* What is my chance? It is to fully rely on God to transform my heart and free me from momentary distresses of soul. As my life testifies, nothing beats the power and joy of looking up and finding the God-of-Extravagant-Love looking full in your face.
– David Ewert (November 16, 2018)
*Tomorrow Never Dies is a 1997 British spy film, the eighteenth entry in the James Bond series ….. for the missing score tracks. Pulp’s effort was re-titled as “Tomorrow Never Lies” and appeared as a b-side on their single “Help The Aged”: “Tomorrow never lies, / So live for today. / Don’t be afraid / Of the skeletons / Of yesterday. / Each morning brings you closer to your goal / So grab your chance, / don’t let it go. / The city streets are littered / With the casualties, / The could haves / The should haves / And the would’ve beens. / Don’t let this chance slip by. / Because / Tomorrow never lies. / Tomorrow never lies…” [https://en.wikipedia.org]